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’___ From The Times: ___‘A young girl, who was blown out to sea on aset of inflatable teeth, was rescued by a man onan inflatable lobster. A coast-guard spokesmancommented, “This sort of thing is all toocommon these days.”___ From The Gloucester Citizen: ___‘A sex line caller complained to TradingStandards. After dialing an 0891 number from anadvertisement entitled “Hear Me Moan” the caller wasplayed a tape of a woman nagging her husband forfailing to do jobs around the house. Consumer Watchdogsin Dorset refused to look into the complaint, saying,“He got what he deserved.”___ From The Daily Telegraph in a piece headed“Brussels Pays 200,000 Pounds to Save Prostitutes”: ___“ ... the money will not be going directly intothe prostitutes’ pocket, but will be used to encouragethem to lead a better life. We will be training themfor new positions in hotels.”___ From The Derby Abbey Community News: ___“We apologize for the error in the lastedition, in which we stated that ‘Mr Fred Nicolme is. The blood mixed with tears and mascara and made her look like a disheveled, sad circus clown.The bad man decided that the cat and mouse game was over. His penis was bulging within his pants. He was ready for Act II. Dragging the woman by her hair, he led her stumbling through the mansion, crashing against walls and cabinetry in search of a door that would lead to the garage. There was a certain yellow Porsche convertible he wanted to find.It took him awhile to find the correct door, with the young woman tripping behind his every step, her head bowed as he led her painfully by the hair. Once in the garage, he flicked on the light, and there was the gleaming, $90,000 sports car sitting alone in the three car garage. He admired the vehicle for a long moment, then dragged the car’s owner over to it and threw her onto the hood. The young woman’s long, lean body slid off the car and she landed with a thump on her ass on the garage floor beside the front wheel. The evil young man.
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