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She felt horrible and the child within her seemed equally disturbed. How could it not be, if its mother was in such a terrible state?She had left her windows closed, the drapes and curtains tightly drawn shut. She cared not whether the suns had risen and a new day had dawned. She wept for her only love, the one half that matter most in the world. The other half, his own half as well, was stirring uneasily in her belly. She tried to think comforting thoughts but all she managed was to utter with a croak:"Sleep, my loving child. Sleep, for I cannot."She wandered aimlessly around their home, every once in a while hugging herself as if vainly trying to land herself in Amonas' arms. But it was to no avail, for he could not appear out of thin air. And still she cried, at times silently with tears welling up in her eyes and at other times fitfully, with sobs that she could not contain released in languish.She pined for the father of her unborn child, to hold him and caress his face. To kiss. He showed how to put them in the right spots.I said aren't they all the same? He laughed and said no way, very different. Different stages he said. What do you mean, different stages? He said look, here's one with a white boy getting to suck his first black cock, and here's another where he has accepted who he is. The boy in that movie was in girl's clothes and even looked like a chick. Even had little titles. He is a she-male now Dwayne said, the final stage of acceptance.Acceptance of what I asked? Dwayne said the white boy has accepted that she was meant to be a woman, and that she was built for the pleasure of black men. Look at her, how lovely she is, she is just a little white girly looking boy, all smooth and shit. She was never gonna be masculine. He was meant to be a she. Don't you think so, Dwayne asked me?I studied the he-she on the box and marveled at how feminine he-she was. I thought to myself, If I could grow tits, i would look like her. I was very embarrassed at the.
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