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“Pack it up, enough, look at you, two grown women fighting, over me.” I looked at them both and I burst out laughing. “I don’t see what’s funny?” said my wife. “Think about it, two women, fighting over a man, shouldn’t it be the other way around?” Jo started to grin, and then started laughing, my wife looked at the pair of us and then she started too. We ended up, the three of us, in fits of laughter; my sides were hurting from laughing so much. When we finally stopped laughing, I said. “How are we going to resolve this?” Linda answered, “I think we need to think over what’s happened and then, Jo, you will come to our house tomorrow so we can discuss it in a civilised way, and you can’t say no, is that clear?” Jo nodded. “Good, tomorrow night at 7.30. Now, Alan, we are going home, Jo will stay at home tomorrow to consider her actions and, you will be at home with me.” I was going to protest, but, one look from her made me keep quiet. When we got home there was a frosty silence. I found something else that you might like more.” She waited for a moment before blurting out, “Pheasants. Can you imagine? Pheasants. They scared the crap out of me as they flew up all around me. There must have been some type of grain in the area sometime in the past. Anyway, I suppose I disturbed their breakfast. Between their screeching and the flutter of their wings, my heart must have skipped several beats.“Do you think I can hit one in the head with my slingshot?” When he didn’t say anything, she went on, “Those twenty-yard targets weren’t any larger than a pheasant’s head. Of course, the target wasn’t moving, either, but I’ve noticed that pheasants seem to walk a few steps and hesitate, then walk again. Most of the time, we don’t get to notice them on the ground because they see us first and take off, but if I’m really quiet ... Anyway, I’m going back before daylight tomorrow. I’ll find some bushes to hide in and wait for them to come for breakfast. Who knows? I might just.
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