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By the way, there was $4 missing.I think it might have been those bastards at the post office.Sincerely, EdnaThis is a story from Pat and his dinner date ... Now you know why he doesn't have a girlfriendMRE Dinner DateI had a date the other night at my place. On the phone the day before, the girl asked me to "Cook her something she's never had before" for dinner. After many minutes of scratching my head over what to make, I finally settled on something she has DEFINITELY, definitely had never eaten before. I got out my trusty case of MRE's. (Meal, Ready-to-Eat) Field rations that when eaten in their entirety contain 3000+ calories in each meal.Here's what I made: I took three of the Ham Slices out of their plastic packets, took out three of the Pork Chops, three packets of Chicken-a-la-king and eight packets of dehydrated butter noodles and some dehydrated/rehydrated rice.I cooked the Ham Slices and Pork Chops in one pan, sauted in shaved garlic and olive oil. In another pot, I. I get to my locker and see Eddie and Julie waiting on me.“Sorry about the breakup,” Julie chimes, knowing that Monika is a lesbian and our relationship was a fake. “You’ll find someone else.”“Nobody wants his ugly ass,” Eddie teases as Martina joins us and giggles at Eddie’s attempt at humor.I open my locker to get my books as a bunch of folded up papers fall out of my locker. I try to scoop up as many as I can. Eddie, Julie, and Martina are laughing as I look across the hall and see Jenny giving me the ‘I told you so’ look. I walk to the nearest trash can and throw them away as I hear groans up and down the hallway. I’m assuming that some of the girls that slipped the notes in my locker are disappointed. I grab Martina’s hand and we walk to our class.“You could’ve given some of those notes to me,” Eddie says as I hear a slap and a groan. I’m assuming Julie slapped him as Martina and I laugh.The rest of the week goes by without incident, except for all of the attention that I’m.
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