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The ‘violator’ has a bad driving record with a high number of points and is in danger of losing his license, so he hired a lawyer to represent him.On the stand the officer testifies to seeing the man run through the red light.Under cross examination the defense attorney asks;“Officer is this a reasonable facsimile of the ticket that you issued to my client?”The Officer responds, “Yes, sir, that is the defendant’s copy, his signature and mine, same number at the top.”Lawyer: “Officer, is there any particular marking or notation on this ticket you don’t normally make?”Officer: “Yes, sir, in the lower right corner of the narrative there is an “AH,” underlined.”“What does the “AH” stand for, officer?”“Aggressive and hostile, Sir.”“Aggressive and hostile?”“Yes, Sir.“Officer, are you sure it doesn’t stand for asshole?”“Well, sir, you know your client better than I do!”How often does a lawyer get to convict his own client?This one is compliments of BillTwo Irish men were digging a ditch in. After that he handed me a key to the locker on a chain, gave me the once over, licked his lips and smiled. “Enjoy your time at Little Beach.” I walked over to the bungalow, changed, and place my clothing in the locker. I hesitated, and then whispered, “It’s now or never, just do it baby.” I grabbed my tote, walked cautiously out the door, and expected everyone to stare, taunted, and tease me over my naked torso, and missing breast.To my surprise the people around me were open, warm and quite friendly. No one really seemed to notice or ask about my missing breast. However, by the end of that day my heart sank, as I was sure, I’d meet a tall handsome man. One not too embarrassed to with me, and would treat her like a queen for the day. I laughed at that remark as I thought to myself, ‘Oh hell who am I kidding, I want one who’d fuck the daylights out of me and make me feel like a real woman again!’ I did meet a lot of nice people my age. We talked about everything from gourmet cooking.
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