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I excused myself, and went upstairs to consider how my plans for happy fun times had changed. Shit. It appeared that my weekend was summed up in the admonition, ‘No Nookie For You!’.I was puttering around upstairs, folding laundry and putting towels away, when there was a vigorous pounding upon the front door. I tucked a pistol into my belt (‘Be Prepared’ being The Scout Motto), and went to answer it.Ben was there, and Ben was pissed. Well, he appeared angry as well as intoxicated. If I heard him correctly, he had found two positive home pregnancy tests on the bathroom counter, and assumed that Britney was the owner. I was not about to open the screen door for an intoxicated guy with poor judgment, so I let him carry on for a while. Linda and Britney appeared at my side, and Ben kicked things into higher gear.He initiated his short lecture series on “Sluts, And The Slutty Sluts Who Don’t Control Them”. From the prologue, it evidently featured Britney and Linda, and that served as an. I rolled over, reached for the phone andchecked the caller ID. It was Tyler."Hello?" I answered."Hey Nikki," he said. "Whatcha doing?" I'm just laying in bed." Hmm. I wish I was there with you," He said in a sultry way.Oh God. I hope he doesn't try to initiate intimacy over the phone. Howdo I respond to this? I should tell him I'm not in that kind of mood."No you don't. I've got bad gas."I could hear him laughing on the other side of the phone."It's not that funny," I told him over his laughter. "It smells likesomething died in here."He continued to laugh harder. I'm glad I have Nicole and Tyler to laughat my jokes. It's been a long time of me laughing with only myself. Icouldn't help but chuckle along with him. I'm glad he's laughingconsidering I was lying my ass off. I didn't want to stay on the phonetoo long with him. I thought his girlfriend talking about bodilyfunctions would have him hang up immediately."Was there something you wanted Tyler?" Oh yeah" he said, his laughter.
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