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“Let's try it.”Was she kidding?“Lay down." She patted the center of her bed.I was stunned, powerless, and soon noticing the speckles of her bedroom ceiling. She was wearing a black skirt cut a few inches above the knees. She knelt next to me with a coy smile."Listen Bryan, this doesn't mean we hang out. Comprende'? We'll do it but you better not tell!"She pulled her skirt up. She was . . . She was actually going to do it!The thought was like a hairbrush to my forearms.She straddled me, her back facing me. She looked over her shoulder and into my eyes. Her gaze was unchanging; her panties soft cotton, soft yellow, and becoming thread-bare. Her back was a smooth-arch from her tailbone to her shoulder blades. Her lower back concaved to her spreading hips.Although beautiful, the sight evoked senses of peril. Her weight was greater than my face and could pin me without recourse. The dimensions of her hips and bottom were much bigger than my face.Plus, one had to remember: This was her. . DIFFERENT from everything else in life.? I mean, I guess one minute I?m supposed to beall "so what do YOU think the recursion termination condition is" andthen suddenly it's like "say, how 'bout I lie on the computer lab floorand you STARE INTO MY ASSHOLE WHILE YOU FURIOUSLY LICK MY GENITALIA LIKE ANINSANE, OUT-OF-CONTROL ANIMAL AND THRUST YOUR HARD DICK DOWN MY THROAT AND SLAPYOUR HAIRY BALLS AGAINST MY FACE unless that?s inappropriate, in which case Iguess we?d better calculate the optimal loop index increment instead?. Owww, theinconsistency!? Context faultinterrupt!? Shutdown!? Embarrassing? embarrassing!? Abort! ??I?m sorry Faye, I?m afraid I can?t DO that?. THAT?Swhy I never went out on dates in college.?Because no matter how relaxed the situation supposedly is, the abovediscontinuity is always implicitly manifest.?Except while you?re actually doing it, sex is just so blatantlyembarrassing and pointless, the elephant in the room that nobody talks about,and I?m just no good at.
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