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Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to New York. The weather ahead is good, so we should have an uneventful flight. So, sit back, relax, and ... OH MY GOD!"Silence followed ... Some moments later, the captain came back on the intercom. "Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry if I scared you. While I was talking to you, a flight attendant accidentally spilled coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!"From the back of the plane, a passenger yelled"For the love of God, you should see the back of mine!"This one is compliments of AnonymousA married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet.One day the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet, as well. Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It sure is dark in here, isn't it?" Yes it is," the man replies."Do you wanna buy a baseball?" asks the little boy."No, thank you," the man replies."I think you do wanna buy a baseball," the. It wasn't skin like I first thought. Underneath they were even weirder. Look 71, could I have a drink or something?" X asked."Sure, my turn to apologise. Where are my manners, would you like one too?"Y nodded back.71 stood, and turned to face the blank wall. He motioned a waving arm over a spot that was just a lighter shade of grey than the rest. The dispenser emerged from the wall."OK guy's and girl's what's your poison?" It'll be a A9 for me and a D3 for Y, please" Good choice, very healthy. A B6 for me. I'm trying to cut down. Lose a bit of bulk, but it's damn hard."With practiced ease 71 collected and carried the three drinks to the table. He placed each one carefully, and then he lifted his to his plump lips. He downed the steaming concoction in one long swallow."Oh, that hits the spot! Please continue."X sipped his drink a few times, blinked, and began to talk."Underneath they were even weirder, as I said they were bipedal and real skinny. They had two tentacles, inflexible.
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