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The voice said, "Thus saith the Lord: If thy right eye offends thee, pluck it out. If they dick offends thee, cut it off!"I whispered to Emma, "Is that really in the Bible?"Emma said to the fat man, "It looks like you already did the eye part; how about the dick?"The fat man looked stricken. He pulled down the zipper of his pants and reached in and pulled out a truly puny penis. I said to Emma, "For heaven's sake, don't let him cut it off!"I heard the sonorous voice of DeMille shout "Stop! Go sinner and sin no more! If you try this again, you will be eating your balls for breakfast!"The fat man turned and ran like hell. Both Emma and I were laughing by the time the man's van had sped down the street. I hugged her. She can turn even a dangerous event into a comic misadventure.I said, "Emma, that man is a menace to society. We should do something to be sure he doesn't try to harm anyone else."She laughed. "I saw 'A Clockwork Orange', Momma. That little heavenly vision is implanted in. "Not a word to Mike. I'll tell him you are on the phone. Can't wait." My wife yelled for me to pick up and I clicked the button on the phone and answered as if I had not been there before. Horse mentioned nothing of the conversation with my wife and I didn't think he would. There was no change in my wife's behavior and I knew that I could not mention my knowledge of this without her getting pissed off at me for spying on her. I suffered through the next two days and arranged covertly with my boss to be replaced on the Toronto trip. Wednesday morning I packed my bag and left the house with a kiss from my wife, supposedly headed for Toronto. When she left for work I snuck back into the house. When Shelly came home after work she was unaware that I was there but I saw her every movement as she changed into more casual clothing. I couldn't help noticing that she changed her underwear and was now wearing a pair of her nicest pink frilly kind. I guess Horse couldn't wait as she had just.
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