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" Okay," I try to say, but nothing comes out and I do turn away then. Feeling embarrassed, as if everyone is staring at me. Wanting to run and forcing myself to walk with a dignity I don't possess. I go home, feeling worse than I ever have before. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. There's no one I can ask, no one who has the answer. I can't tell any of my friends, any of the girls at school. I'm sure none of them are like me, they couldn't be. I'm more alone than ever."How did it go?" Rachael asks me. We're in her bedroom and I'm an inch away from losing it completely. Any second I'm going to cry again."It didn't." I wipe at my eyes. "I got carded." Duh!" Rachael laughs. "I could have told you that was gonna happen." Why didn't you?" I glare at her, transferring blame and she shrugs it off."What are you gonna do?" she asks and I don't have an answer. "Look, if all you want is a kiss with a girl ... just kiss me."Rachael's become weird. Ever since she lost her virginity, things. The second day would be putting down the primer - and that wood sheathing could suck up the primer like you wouldn’t believe. The third day would be spent painting with the finish paint using the spray and back roller approach. The fourth day would be spent painting the trim. He couldn’t rush the work or it would look terrible.After working all day, Tim would go home and work on his own house. He would work until 9:00 or so and then return to his parent’s house. The only days he could spend a full day on his house, was Saturday, but that was often cut short for his date with Lily. So the progress on fixing his house was keeping pace with a snail.With Cathy and Sandra still working the office cleaning business, they weren’t available to help Tim work on his house. Benny would go over to Tim’s house to help fix up the place. They would work a couple of hours and then Tim would head home.Benny was no longer having fake dates with Cathy on the weekends, since Cathy and Sandra could visit.
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