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”An elderly couple was sitting together watching television. During a commercial break, the husband asked his wife, “Whatever happened to our sexual relations?”After a long thoughtful silence and during the next commercial, the wife replied, “You know, I’ve no idea. I don’t even think we got a Christmas card from them last year.”Yesterday I was at my local Supermarket buying a large bag of Winalot dog food for my loyal pet and was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.What did she think I had, an elephant? So, since I’m retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Winalot Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in hospital last time. I’d lost 2 stone before I woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Winalot nuggets. As I sat at the small table she started to feel my shoulders from behind. She walked around and went under the clear glass table and started to feel my crotch. There was not much room under the table and she came out from beneath it. I stood up and we embraced, kissing each other, letting our tongues explore a new mouth. Jackie backed up to the counter and sat up on it. I went to her and got between her legs to continue kissing her.Finally, in a voice tinged with impatience Jackie asked, “Why haven’t you made a move on me yet?”I responded “I was waiting for you.”With that she took me by the hand, told me I had a nice ass, and led me to her bedroom. It was a nice bedroom, small and neat, decorated with a woman’s touch. Once again we embraced, kissing deeply while our hands started exploring the unknown. She stepped away from me and pulled all the room shades down, making it just dark enough to create a mood of excitement. She started undressing, and I followed suit. I got into her.
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