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A guy just cannot go down on a whore, or even kiss one.I had come into a bit of money, much more than I could possibly spend, considering the way I lived, but certainly enough to support a woman. The problem of finding a young woman, however, perplexed me. A thought then came to me one morning in the shower as I washed my hair with my eyes closed. It was an idea that at first seemed absolutely ridiculous, but upon reflection it made perfect sense; I would advertise for a girl.In the city where I lived there was one of those alternative newspapers that come out once a week, a paper that contained some muckraking news articles but which was mostly filled with stories and ads about jazz concerts, nightlife and restaurants. It was a publication that appealed to the younger crowd, and every week there were several pages of personal notices: men seeking men, women seeking women, men seeking women, and so on.That same day I placed an ad of my own, which read: "Free college education. Left, right, at the same time. Even our strides were the same length. ‘And I don’t have gonorrhea now or anything?’ She erupted with a surprisingly squeaky giggle, ripping her hand away from mine and spinning around to block my way on the pavement. ‘Holy shit!’ She shoved me. ‘Fuck you. I’m clean.’ ‘Yeah?’ ‘Yeah.’ She tried to shove me again but I knocked her arms away. It only made her grin bigger. She made a third attempt and I gripped her shoulders to push back. She resisted with that same strength, feet planted firmly on the ground. So for a second I gave everything I had. ‘Yeah, okay,’ she growled when I almost slammed her into the fence. ‘You gonna show me those muscles sometime?’ I let go of her. Damned butterflies again. ‘Only if you’ll show me yours.’ She scoffed and pressed into me. ‘Aren’t your feelings still hurt from last night?’ ‘Hey, come on. I’m just trying to be sure.’ ‘You’re uptight.’ ‘You’re obviously not a virgin.’ ‘And you are?’ ‘Well, I was.’ Everything about.
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