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Ten minutes later a eunuch arrived with it and I took young Carol out of Georgina's sight and put the cream on. Georgina didn't seem pleased when we returned and snapped, "Since you seem to be looking after her, you'd better take her place at the staff serving table." Actually this was a good option even if I had to work quite hard. Being small, Carol wasn't actually able to serve but was kept busy replenishing dishes and removing empty ones. Several of the staff I knew, spoke and commented on my role.I rather cattily suggested to one of the wives who remarked on my slumming it again, "You should try it for a day too," but I knew she never would.By the end of the day I was tired and ready for bed but I did put in a request for Cass to attend me in the guestroom I'd been allocated the following evening. Poor girl looked worried when we met at gym the next morning but she didn't say anything. Several times during the day I noticed her whispering with her friends and looking at me. ”“After that the desires went dormant for a while, and few of my partners seemed to trigger them enough for me to just come out and ask. I think it was because I didn’t feel strongly enough about any of them to make myself vulnerable in that way. I also believe that the reason my submission was never under my or anyone else’s control — why it arrived randomly and unexpectedly, I mean — was that, on a subconscious level, I was afraid of it being under control. Anyone’s control.”“But while I was in my first semester of law school, the desires came roaring back. I wasn’t in a serious relationship at the time — this was before the one that ended in a miscarriage — so, lacking any better ideas, I contacted a professor of human sexuality at my alma mater. He used his network to connect me with an experienced dominant. He wasn’t a professional or anything, but he was highly respected in the local community. He was an older man, very handsome, a good listener who was extremely incisive.
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