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So I told him “Son, you’re 10 years old now and you’re old enough to know the truth about Santa ... he fucking hates Muslims.”My girlfriend told me last Christmas she wanted something surprising and sexy. Turned out she didn’t mean rape.It has been reported that due to the negative impact the slow recovery has had on economies all over the world, this Christmas, Santa Claus will have only two “Ho’s” not three as is the custom.Additionally, it was reported, that if the recovery continues at its current slow rate, in 2018 Santa might have to do with only one, Ho.I asked the wife what she wants for Christmas this year “Some chocolate and a nice surprise would be lovely” she replied. Kinder egg it is then.A DIFFERENT NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS... Twas the night before Christmas, and geez it was neat,The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat.The doors were all bolted, and the phone was off the hook,It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.Momma in her teddy, and I am in the. I keep leaving them on the plate.The worst things are the carrots. Every blessed salted snack in house has disappeared, replaced by carrot sticks.I told her I was no rabbit and refused to eat the damn things. She swore to me I would get no pussy from her until she saw me eat a damn carrot. That was eight days ago. I am horny as hell.So that is why I am sitting naked in the kitchen, nursing a hard on, carving carrots into cocks. I figured the only way I was going to stomach eating those things would be if they were coated with her pussy juice.I am satisfied with two of my creations. I left a portion of each un-whittled so I had a handle for them. The carved parts were pretty close to my dick in size and shape although one ended up slimmer than the other.I rinsed the carrots and wrapped them in a moist towel. After cleaning up in the kitchen I went to the bedroom and put the carrots under the foot of the bed.The woman returned from shopping the antique stores late in the day and again.
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