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Actually there are a LOT of old saying in the muscle-bound barbarian hero business. This is mostly because the average muscle-bound barbarian can't read. And so an oral tradition is necessary. (Although if asked, most muscle-bound barbarians would think that an oral tradition is something that pleasure slaves are trained to do.)Anyway, the saying pertinent to this part of our story is this: "Never, ever give a witch, wizard, or sorcerer an even break. 3 feet of steel through the gizzard will mess up any spell they are trying to cast on you at the time."In Gonad The Ballbarian's case, this was a little too long for him to remember. So his teachers simplified things for him. "If you see someone trying to cast a spell on you, kill him her or it."Gonad had wandered away from the city a week ago, and he was very bored. In a whole week, he hadn't seen any monsters, demons, wizards or even a thief. For that matter, he hadn't even seen any luscious tavern wenches or beautiful pleasure slaves. ?I mean, look at you. What the fuck?Everything can be reversed, but you?re so different, nobody evenknows you. Even you don?t know you. What?s a few more hours of thisshit???What shit? Where are we going?? I felt a little panicked, and yethappy. Total extremes. What was it, nine in the morning. Thirteenmore hours? The county records office wouldn?t be open for anothertwenty-four. If he dumped me on the street now, I?d have to find aflop house. Until I got that check, and cashed it, I was a fly in afield of frogs.Maybe it?d even work out. What could they possibly do what was worsethan they?d done to myself? It?s just be like a normal fuck-me day,and then I?d get a fresh start bright and early, find a thrift storefor some frumpy clothing that hid my body. Female clothing, Isuppose, at least for now. Then I?d visit the county, board a buswest, license place and OVER.?First stop.? He pulled into a parking lot of a storefront buildingin the south side of the city, not my favorite.
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" I'll make a Pineapple and Brown Sugar Glaze for the ham." I'd like that, Mom."The women spent the next fifteen minutes going through the cook book and what Kay had in the kitchen and pantry."We'll be back soon. Rob, make a reservation for about an hour and a half from now," Kay said and then led the women out the door.The rest of us sat around and talked while the women were gone. We talked about how my business was going and how things were on the farm. I found out that Junior and Tommy weren't alone there. Robert had arranged for Reyna to come to the farm and go with Junior to the airport. Reyna was going to stay at the farm while Robert and Janice were with us. After the Thanksgiving weekend, Reyna had taken Junior home with her to announce their engagement to her parents and friends. She wanted to do it in person and hadn't told anyone over the phone.The women came back with a few bags of groceries and put them away in the kitchen before we left for the restaurant. My parents.

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