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She wasone of those big tan athletic girls that California seems to churn outlike hotcakes. At the time, I was a skinny little redheaded withgreen eyes and lots of freckles. Diana, the counselor, realized how Ifelt after she caught me spying on her when she was in the shower andshe sat me down and had a long talk with me. She told me my feelingsweren’t bad, just inappropriate at that time and in that place. Thetalk didn’t make my crush go away, but it made me feel better aboutmyself. When I got back home I surpressed my feelings about othergirls and conformed. After all, I was in junior high and conformitywas the name of the game. And conformity ruled my life through highschool and college. I met Jeff and fell in love, or convinced myselfthat I had, and eventually we got engaged. Jeff treated me like aprize that he’d won in a game, a game that I didn’t understand. I hadgrown into quite a beauty, something that I was quite aware of buttook no. ”She went out and closed the door behind her. I was moving toward the door to go out and catch her and tell her not to waste her money on a cab when I caught myself. The break wasn’t clean, but it was still a break. I caught her and talked her out of getting a cab it would just prolong things. As it stood right then it was over. Leave it that way was my thinking. I went into the kitchen, poured myself a generous amount of Jack in a glass over ice and sat down at the kitchen table and thought about what had just gone down. I had really liked Christine. Shit! Admit it Dave. It was more than just like. I honestly thought that the relationship was going to go somewhere. I finished the Jack and went to bed.The next few weeks went by and for me it was pretty much go to work, go home, sleep, get up and go to work again. I did think about Christine a lot, but resisted all the urges to pick up the phone and call her. It was a Thursday, three weeks since the day Christine and I parted when I.
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