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Are you sure?" He asked."Yeah, tonight. I'm sure. But first you have to answer my questions. All my questions." She said."You've got a deal Babe." Anything. Ask me anything. But no more questions when where under the Board Walk." He said."Deal. Just tell me everything that happened from the time you first saw her until the time she left." She said."Okay. I can do that. I was getting bored. You said you'd see me outside your house in ten minutes and a half hour later there was still no sign of you. I felt like having a cigarette, but I was trying not to. I didn't want to kiss you when you came out with cigarette breath. But after another five minutes, I said screw it." He said."Screw it. That's what you thought. I wasn't worth waiting a few more minutes for." She said laughing."Oh yeah, you know you're worth it Babe, I was just getting bored. Anyway I looked down to lite the cigaratte and when my eyes looked up again, there she was standing there. It was weird, really weird. I mean I. The guests in the front pews responded with ripples of laughter. Even the priest smiled broadly. As her father gave her away in marriage, the bride gave him back his credit card.Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.Three friends from the local congregation were asked, “When you’re in your casket, and friends and congregation members are mourning over you, what would you like them to say?”Artie said, “I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a fine spiritual leader, and a great family man.”Eugene commented, “I would like them to say I was a wonderful teacher and servant of God who made a huge difference in people’s lives...”Al said, “I’d like them to say, ‘Look, he’s moving!’”Smith climbs to the top of Mt. Sinai to get close enough to talk to God.Looking up, he asks the Lord.“God, what does a million years mean to you?”The Lord replies, “A minute.”Smith asks, “And what does a million dollars mean to you?”The Lord.
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