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Two points, two flats, and a packet of gravel. I’ll raise you this boulder I’m laying on. Checkmate, honey — beat you at your own damn game. This heat really is ridiculous. It’s like Satan’s fucking breath. I could do one of those ‘this is your brain on drugs’ commercials without the egg right now. At least I’ve stopped sweating. That’s probably not a good thing, come to think of it. What is with the sun? Now it’s clear over there. I’m pretty sure that I didn’t get up to eighty-eight miles per hour. I’d be going the other way, anyhow. Go back and leave my bike on top of the car. Go down to the waterpark with Karen like she wanted. No, I had to get in one last ride. Fucking stupid. Should have took the hint when Ron and Greg told me no fucking way because the heat index was going to be a hundred-twenty degrees. Can’t be more than a hundred-fourteen. I could be sitting in the pool with her right now. Her in that little bitty bikini that makes all the guys drool and all the girls scowl.. Reeves is from the court so I’m covered.”At that point Reeves took out his wallet and showed the wife his badge and that shut her up for a minute or so, but then she followed me as I went through the gathering up my things and kept trying to get me to talk to her, but I ignored her. Finally I said:“Just shut the fuck up. You are the one who got that bullshit order of protection. The way I read it it says I’m to have nothing to do with you and to me that means I’m not supposed to even talk to you and I wouldn’t want to violate that order so just shut up.”It took an hour and a half to get all my stuff out of the house and garage and as I was leaving she asked:“When are you going to start paying me my five hundred a week?”“Depends on how bad you want to stay a member of your church.”“What does that mean?”“You told me that in a divorce for infidelity the cheater gets kicked out of your church right?”“Yeah.”“So here’s the deal. If I have to pay you five hundred a week I’m going to counter.
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