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Really for me anyway, that was the moment when I had understood I wasthe girl kissing a boy, and he seemed to really like me, and like me asone. I don't think I really felt his hand on my back after our firstkiss began or even that I reached around him myself, but once things arein motion, that's kind of all it takes.Just like when you kiss a girl you like the second time, you lean init's always better once any apprehension is gone and that's how I felt,although in a way it might have been less about the actual kiss.Thankfully I didn't feel those initial butterflies that I have at times,so I didn't overthink things like I've done with much in my life, andthankfully he didn't hesitate to kiss me again, or I'm sure how my lifewould have changed. Or maybe it wouldn't? I don't know?Our second kiss would be lasting though, as we soon French kissed and itbecome more of a make out session. In a way you do slip into the role ofbeing kissed like you've always wondered about, and become a. I think I just wanted to be somebody else. I went out and bought all the stuff and the pic of me in the red stockings was my first photo shoot. I put myself out there to test the waters and monitor feedback, and everybody wanted me. I could have had any guy I wanted, it was.... Powerful, I was hooked. I did this all in hiding and it became an obsession, I would do solo videos, I spent thousands of dollars on clothes, stayed learning to fuck my ass with dildos, in so tight this was very difficult at first, I loved dildoing my ass and pulling it out to suck it, so for months I practiced, rejecting men left and right, was waiting for the right one, and was also obsessed with finding a couple. I've really let go this past couple months and talked to a lot of people and started to give In to my repressed desires, I was Programmed to deny all notions because I would go to hell for being gay, that's how I was raised. Well so I suppressed my sexuality, caging this little horny blonde freak.
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