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Call your plumber.”;At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee : “Invite us to your next blowout.”;On an Electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”;In a Non-smoking Area: “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.”;On a Maternity Room door: “Push. Push. Push.”;At a Car Dealership: “The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.”;Outside a Muffler Shop: “No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”;In a Veterinarian’s waiting room: “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit ... Stay”;At the Electric Company: “We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time. However, if you don’t, YOU will be de-lighted.”;In a Restaurant window: “Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”;In the front yard of a Funeral Home: “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”;At a Propane Filling Station: “Thank Heaven for little grills.”;In a Chicago Radiator Shop: “Best place in town to take a leak...”;And the best one for last... ; Sign on the back of another. “You are not so bad yourself.” she replied with a grin, “You don’t know how long I have wanted to do that.” It was then I realized that she had been interested in me as well. “Why didn’t you say something sooner?” I asked. “You or I were always going out with someone. I didn’t want to ruin a chance you or I had for a relationship.”. “What about us?” I asked, “Why couldn’t we have a relationship?”. “You know that wouldn’t work out.” she replied. “We are great friends, but I don’t see us having kids together or getting married. What we have is vastly different.” I could see where Andrea was coming from. In all of my dreams and fantasies about Andrea I had never thought beyond the sex. She had also come to this realization as well. “As long as I can be your closest friend, I will be happy.” I replied. “Maybe we can be friends with benefits from now on?”. Andrea looked at me and started to laugh. “I guess so. At least I know you are not a total freak.”. “And I know that you are not a.
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