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I know exactly why she was always mentioning me to him. No doubt she was comparing his kids to me. I never lived up to anyone in her eyes.Well, at least she thought I was doing something constructive on my laptop when I was holed up in my room.Truth is, ninety-percent of the time I was watching porn and masturbating. Look, these constant wayward thoughts about a man that would probably never be mine had to be released somehow.“Well, psychotherapy is a bit like programming,” I ventured quietly.Jacob chuckled and nodded. “Well, your mother is always going on about it.”“Yes, she tends to go on about me ever since dad died,” I said without thinking.I saw his eyes fall to the floor and it was obvious he was contemplating something.My father died two years after Jacob and his family moved in next door.Since then, my mother raised me on her own. I guess part of her issue of complaining about me was embedded in the fact that she was worried about whether she’d done a good job raising. Be anything you want to be. You already look sexy, now it's time to be sexy."His words were like magic to me. It was something in the way he would say things that really did it.Now I was sexy, but I had to be sexy, like looking and acting were two separate things. I had to prove to him I was sexy, I had to make him want sex. I knew what I needed to do. Slowly, I reached behind my back and pulled on my bra clasp.I took the straps off my shoulder and rolled over. My bra lay over my breasts, nothing holding it on anymore. I could see it was working, I was being sexy.I let him photograph me like that for a bit, and then I pulled it to the side completely. For the first time, I was showing someone other than my boyfriend my breasts. But by this point, my boyfriend was not even going through my mind.I just kept going. I was going to make him think I was the sexiest girl ever.Now I knew I could be the sexiest girl, and I felt I could make anyone think it. He had this look on his face that.
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