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I do not blame you for occasionally forgetting me or ignoring me. I was a quiet child and I love you all dearly. Kelly my dear older sister I do not blame you for the years of abuse, the bruises, broken nose, and handprints on my back, or shattered dreams. I love you now and forever as my sister and I will never blame you. Now world as I matured and grew I began to understand that you are cruel and I need to look out for myself. But I did a poor job of that too. I was pushed around and taken advantage all the time. When I was 17 I found someone I thought was the love of my life. As I write this I am crying. I forgive him for all that he has done but the memories still plague me. I do not blame you for not thinking before acting, so unjustly taking my purity and innocence from me, and making me mature so quickly. I still do love you but things have change and you plague my mind not as someone that loves me but as the one that took that special something from me when I was so. I heard my voice say,"Please".Jim asked "Please what?" I hesitated at what I wanted to say, what I was about to say. "Please, take me"I heard my voice say. Jim smiled and lifted me off my feet, carrying me in his arms, into the living room where my husband was passed out and snoring. I remember looking down at his obese body and smiling inside at what was about to happen... I hoped. I pointed Jim to the master bedroom and he placed me on the bed. I slid off, and stood in front of him sliding off his jacket and took his tie off. As I worked the buttons on his shirt, Jim's well-muscled chest and stomach came into view. He kissed me deeply again, and unzipped the back of my dress, letting it slide to the floor. I stepped out of my heels, making me even shorter, compared to him, and stood before him in nothing but a bra and panties. Jim slid off his shirt, unfastened his pants. Stepping out of his shoes and pants, he slid off his boxers and I gasped; at his hardened body, his small waist.
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