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I get the skinning knives, the come along, all the goods. Then I settle in for the night and sleep pretty well.Next morning I'm off to see my dear friends the smelly bastard family. I light up the 'Pay Attention to Me I'm The Thunder God' light, and start trying to get them to come with me. This takes a long assed time to get across. Seems like American standard hand gestures like 'Hiya', 'Commere', and similar are basically not current. So, we play this game where Red-Face and I hoot at each other and posture, I back up, he doesn't follow, then I step forward again, more hooting and posturing, and no results.This goes on for a while until some smelly dude in the back says something like "Gobble Poo", and Red-Face looks at him, looks at me, and takes a couple of steps in my direction. I hoot like a maniac, and smile, and nod and do other stupid shit he doesn't understand, and I back up a couple of steps and point at the distance. Sigh. Okay, repeat this a few times, and I yell.. ”“Say ‘one,’ rather. We’re beginning another punishment. For your forgoing your knickers”“One ... two ... three ... four ... Ouch! Five.”“Now, aren’t you sorry you forgot your knickers?”“Really sorry! Dave, can’t we drop the game? I need you now!”“All right. We don’t want to let all that moisture go to waste. Yes, darling.”“Oh, that’s better. Some of those really hurt, you know.”“They must have. I can feel heat from your butt on my leg. The rest is warm, too. Delightful.”“You feel good, too. Yes! Like that; just like that.”“Y’know, you do things to this blouse that real schoolgirls don’t. These handles are much better than the pigtails.”“Your hands feel better on them, too. But move, damn you.”“‘Damn you, sir.’ The game isn’t over yet”“Please move, sir. I’m hot. Are you continuing my punishment?”“Yes. Take this ... and this ... and this!”“Yessss! Stab me. Drive yourself into me.”“Skirt’s a real problem ... Now. Do you feel me?”“There and inside. Yes, Dave ... Yes!”“Oh, my darling. Oh,.
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