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None of this is made up. I just hope that you laugh as much as I do when I remember the fond memories that I have of my personal life. I was going to this gym, (yes, I use to work out) and one of the fitness instructors happened to catch my eye. She was this knock out blonde that stood about five foot three. She had green eyes that could soothe a charging bear, and her laugh was like the whispers of angels from above. Well after a couple of days of planning in my head how I was going to ask her out. I finally worked up enough nerve and walked over to her and asked her straight out, as best as I could, if she would like to go to the movies with me sometime. To my shock she said yes! But my mind didn’t register the “yes” part, so I turned around and started to walk away, until it hit me like a ton of bricks that she said yes. So we set up a time and place where we would meet. So skipping ahead, we went to the local theater to catch a move that she wanted to see, being a nice guy that I. 'What's wrong?" Most pretty girls," I said, expressing an idea I had but was not sure about, "know they are pretty when they are awful young, six or seven maybe, certainly by the time they are ten. When did you find out?" Find out what?" she asked after swallowing hard."That you are beautiful, truly beautiful."She made a face and wriggled her nose, looked at the ceiling, sniffed and then at me. "What do you want?" Nothing," I said. "I had some money, money I got by killing some men, and I was eager to spend it, blood money, understand." Killing. You killed people?" I'm a soldier," I told her. "I didn't want you to have to become a prostitute." Why not? You don't know me or care two cents about me. Do you?" Because you are much too pretty to be a whore," I said.She waved at me as if I were a fly or a bee or something. "What blarney, nonsense. I've looked at myself. I'm plain as dishwater." You must have a crooked glass," I said. She was not a raving beauty nor did she possess classic.
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