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”Dr Jeffries made some notes. “May I ask why their mother left?”“Um, no problem,” Duncan responded. “We met in college; she was a communications major but was really into drama and acting in school performances. After graduating, she got into community theater and was quite good, actually. But she wanted to spread her wings and see if she could go pro. There wasn’t much in Toronto for her; she wanted the big time, like Hollywood. Her friends, and also the directors of the plays she was in, told her she wasn’t at Hollywood level but she wouldn’t hear it. My own career opportunities relied on my staying here; I couldn’t think of relocating to the west coast of the U.S. for the remote chance that she’d succeed. She was also ... how should I put it ... very self-centered—I guess that’s kind of common in actors ... and ... um ... really wasn’t a very good mom to the kids. She kind of made it clear that they were a drag on her. She became very ... ah ... distant, both to the kids and me,. This was a weakness I could and should have recognised in myself. If I had understood myself better then, I could perhaps have saved us all so much worry in the future but at the time I didn’t realise its significance.Ridiculously, I didn’t feel able to ask Tony as I lay in his arms in my post-coital glow. Instead I resolved to get the morning after pill the following day ‘just in case’. I would have to visit a town some distance away where I wasn’t known but that could be done. I silently prayed that it wouldn’t be too late to stop any unwanted outcome from our first copulation three days ago and tried to concentrate on Tony’s question: what had we started?Although I wasn’t ready to think about it, he was quite right to ask. That evening our relationship had moved from something that could have been passed off as a pleasant but definitely one-off mistake to something much more deliberate, much more calculated and I had to admit, much more enjoyable.And what on earth should I do.
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