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I suppose I’m not always the neatest girl in the world, which is why I have a cleaning service deal with my condo every week. Anyway, the ashtray is full of cigarette butts smoked by myself and my gal pals. There must be 50 fucking cigarettes in there, along with a shitload of ash. The best part is that most of the butts have lipstick rings on them. Just think of the symbolism!With pep in my step and a smile on my face, and a gross full ashtray in my hand, I’m returning to Stu’s condo to administer a final degradation. During the last part of this recap, I prefer to refer to Stu as ?it? rather than he. No explanation required. I make it a point to walk somewhat stealthily to its door. That’s because I suspect that it will be engaging in its favorite activity now that it thinks I’m gone. Sure enough, as I open the door I can hear the telltale rustling from the closet. I can feel my resolve strengthening. This loser thinks he can just wait until I leave and then do whatever he wants. "Mr. Head," Miss Chow started."Please Lucy, call me Dick," he looked left, "Hey Benny, get Lucy a beer on me," he ordered."Alright then Dick. What would you like to tell the American public about why you think you are the man to be the next President of the United States?" That's a real good fuckin' question Lucy. The way I see it, somebody gotta stick their nuts on the choppin' block and make this country great again. Nobody's done that for a long, long time." Are you at all worried that something from your past might come out and tarnish the Office of the President?" Lucy continued."Hell no, everybody's got skeletons in their closet, what's the big deal? The thing is with me though; I ain't got no closet. All my fuck-ups are out in plain sight for every goddamned body to see," Dick announced."How do you stand on foreign policy?" Miss Chow asked."Well, I always said live and let live. But if somebody wants to stick their finger up my ass, I'm gonna bust that motherfucker off at the.
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