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“Look,” I said, taking a deep breath, spreading my hands and trying to be at least a little more conciliatory than I’d been until then. “How about this. I ... move out for a bit. Separate. We don’t have to rush to divorce. Just give us both time to ... find ourselves. Reinvent our relationship. Stop the downward spiral.”It was bullshit of course; once out of there, I was free and I was going to remain that way, but he didn’t need to know that. Give me credit for trying to let him down gently, give him at least some hope. I was pretty sure he’d see that this was the best course once we both had our own lives back.He just looked at me. Stared at me, more like.The moment stretched out.“Say something?” I asked.“Like what?” he answered, his hands spread on the table, bracing him. “This is obviously something you’ve been thinking about a while. What am I supposed to do, argue you out of your feelings?”I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing actually came to mind. He’d actually hit. I had told her Ithought that the stereotypical calendar pics of cowboys, constructionworkers, and firemen were hot. Since we worked in the same firehousewith firemen, she had choosen to focus on that and, in a big sisterfashion, tease me about it. Worse, I admitted there was one that weworked with that I thought was really hot, Zach.Amazingly, right after that confession the department had asked if Iwould take care of Zach who was being released from the hospital, wherehe had been for two months, for treatment for serious burns to his handswhile he was in a fire. While he was in the hospital, while inpossession of his phone, his wife had found out that he was sleepingwith many different women, and kicked him out."I am doing well. The nursing is going great, still a little strangehaving someone living with me though. That is why Anne invited me overhere tonight." I responded although I was unable to look him in theeye."Yea, it sounds like it is going great. I am glad it is.
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