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"There have been many things that Veldruk has done without my knowledge because I chose not to know. I was very content to give him children and watch those children grow. I bore him two sons ... both of which have turned out rather poorly it seems. He allowed that dog Leonidas to kill Xerxes without lifting a finger ... and now he has issued a Kill Order on Vonis for taking an elf female into his bed. My sons have not turned out well it seems Cha'talla, but that is of no matter. I have no use for weak fools." Aikiro turned to another bed of flowers and continued speaking. "My daughters on the other hand ... Yuri is strong like me ... she has much to learn but she is strong. And my youngest daughter will be just as strong. What Veldruk did to her, what you have hidden all these years, it placed a crack in her armor. A crack that you repaired when you stood behind this man who has claimed her heart and kept Veldruk from killing him. This Robert Moran. For that I thank you. Yeah, and I nearly broke my ribs on my airbag. Thanks, bitch.You want me to kiss and make it better?Michael does, if he’s watching.Prudes ... I don’t need him to be watching.So, yeah, superhuman warrior goddesses with magical otherworldly powers fighting strange and incredible monsters for truth, justice and the cis-white male patriarchy way.You’re only saying that to rustle my jimmies.You’re only saying rustle my jimmies to take the piss.You’re only saying take the piss to--I’ll slap you both. Slap you through a wall.You couldn’t hit me. I was never here.I’m surrounded by idiots.More accurately, you’re walled in on two sides by idiots.Thank you for the clarification.It’s important to be technically right. That way the lawyers can’t get you.Anyways, I’m telling the story because Minerva White--I’ve always liked the Color Goddess naming scheme.That’s because Black Eris still sounds badass, but Green Diana and Purple Juno sound stupid.Maybe that’s because I am the badass and--Diana’s.
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You need to stop meeting those guys." Those... you mean... Mom, they're my best friends!" Jamey Stan Junior, it is my sincere _wish_ that you don't see Maple,Richard and Nepal for the next few months. Have I made myself clear?"I snapped my fingers. Again, I had the feeling that I was forced out ofmy own brain for a moment. Then the wish was fulfilled. "Hey, youcan't...!" I can't, I know. But when you're not stoned, you should use your brain,boy! Ask yourself: Are Richard and Nepal really your best friends if youdon't understand them? I mean, their way of living and theirpartnership? And Maple just isn't good company." What?" I told you before. She's not a good influence." Why, Mom?"She took another carrot now, then helped herself to some coffee."If you really want to know, her parents are... hum... up to no good. Ijust find them suspicious. Everyone does. They're away for days likeseasonal workers, but whenever they come back, they lead a life likemillionaires, making huge donations.

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