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’ ‘Well of course she is. She was pretty upset, just what did you say to her?’ May threw at me. ‘Well, I asked her who the father was. She said she didn’t know.’ ‘Oh, great. Men can be so dumb. You doofus, it’s your baby!’ ‘Mine, but how …’ ‘Well, the boy has a penis and the girl has a …’ I interrupted Ann with, ‘Dammit! That’s not what I meant. I should have said—oh, damn! Thanksgiving. It’s my fault. I’m the father. No wonder she was so upset. I’d kinda forgotten all about that.’ With a heavy dose of sarcasm, May responded, ‘I guess it was a real memorable occasion for you, huh?’ ‘Well, I didn’t mean that. It just, kinda, sorta, slipped my mind.’ ‘Oh, I see.’ Ann helped me out. ‘Like you kinda, sorta got her pregnant and she kinda, sorta got highly pissed at you and kinda, sorta went home to Amarillo to kinda, sorta get as far away from you as she can.’ ‘Oh, man’, I groaned. ‘I’m so screwed.’ This time I grabbed the beers. ‘What should I do?’ May contributed, ‘Do you love her?’. ?WHACK! Michelle's cane had slashed Hi's buttocks when they'd gotten home. He'd danced away, and his right hand had pulled to cover his butt, and then he'd screamed.?Because of course his hand was now cuffed to his nipple!?"What's wrong, Hiram?" Michelle had asked sweetly, as? her cane had raised again to welt his shoulder. "Can't move your hands?"?Hi had howled and wept as he'd pulled his hands away from his chest, and then pulled them back, finding that it was best to keep his "hand close to his chest" as they say in gambling...real close!?Michelle and her friends had been in near hysterics watching Hiram bend over to put both his hands on a broom, the handcuff chains pulling the nipples as? he tried to sweep the floor.?Rugby Joe, Michelle's African-American lover had slapped his knee. "Damn, that mo-fo in some trouble boy!"?It had even been more comical as Hiram had to throw his entire body to the floor to scrub it...after all his hands had to be kept within four inches of his.
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