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The horse says, "Wait, I think I can stand over the mud hole!" So, he stretches over the width of the hole and says to the chicken, "Reach up and grab my 'thingy' and pull yourself up!!!" And so the chicken did, pulling herself up to safety.The Moral of the Story?If you're hung like a horse, you don't need a Mercedes to pick up chicks.For those who already have children past this age ... this is hilariousFor those who have children this age ... this is not so funnyFor those who have children nearing this age ... this is a warningFor those who have not yet had children ... this is birth controlThings I've learned from my children... (honest and no kidding!)1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 square foot house 4 inches deep.2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.3. A 3 year olds voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong. "I'd love to, but I promised my editor four chapters. I have one, but it will take me all day Monday to do the other three. And when I get finished with that, if I don't get some fan mail taken care of, it will bury me." Okay," I said, thinking furiously. I had to seal the deal here or I was going to feel like I'd been dumped. "How about Tuesday? We can do Chinese take-out and watch a movie." Great!" she said, and my spirits soared again, because she sounded like she meant it. "You pick the movie."Now do not ask me why the first movie I thought of was Debbie Does Dallas. I have a sneaking suspicion that my cock put it in my brain, because it was firming up ... possibly because I was thinking about Debbie doing Dallas ... or maybe because I was finally going to get to spend some time sitting next to Chris on the couch. I must have gotten distracted by the daydream because I heard my voice say, kind of dreamy like... "Chris Does Dallas." What?" she asked. "I've never heard of that.
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