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Dad, youre supposed to call first. I just happened to be in the neighborhood and I dont have a cell phone, you know. Thats not acceptable, Dad! Jeff, in the meantime, jumps out of the pool, runs up to them, happily greeting Louis, Hi grandpa! Seans head sinks as his father stutters in shock, Sh-Sh-Sean, d-d-did you elope! No Dad. Jeff just calls me Dad, so youre Grandpa! Sternly, getting to what really troubles him, Sean, why in Gods name, is Jeff naked! Why is he naked in front of his girlfriend! Jeff, cover yourself, already! Fearlessly naked, Jeff replies, With all due respect, sir, only you broke a rule. Jeff, you have broken Gods rules. I warn you Sean, in Mark 9:42 Jesus says, If anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck. Dad, you have warned me, and likewise, I warn you! You teach Puritan tradition like its holy writ. Jeff, why dont you go play with Maria. Are you saying that theyounger Finlayson boy has been openly crossdressing for months, andnone of the parents have objected? Oh my, how society's values havechanged!" You misunderstand - I was the only one, outside of his immediatefamily I guess, who knew that Blair Finlayson was wearing girls'clothes to school because the boy strove to keep his vice hidden bychoosing unisex designs that either sex could wear."Principal Von Aft, now pretending to read her mail, replied:"I don't see the problem if the boy favors a unisex look. Are yousaying that he's an emo or a goth? My dear Miss Umbridge, if we wereto expel every boy who wears ear studs or makeup, even black lipstick,as well as a pink tee shirt and tight-fitting jeans, we wouldn't haveenough pupils to qualify for State funding. I fear that we all mustaccommodate ourselves to modernity, Miss Umbridge, tawdry anddispiriting as it may be. The unisex look is here to stay, for boys aswell as girls. Anyway, didn't you just tell me.
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