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"So, you always move into a new place at 11 o clock at night?" I quipped.She laughed and I heard what sounded like a sigh of approval."Definitely not, I've been here all day, and just now decided to put the bed up."I nodded "Ahhhh a sincerely unwise move indeed."She leaned back against a partially assembled dresser and tilted her head."Tell me about it. Do you think you can help me?"Almost immediately her words spurred images of cheap, corny porno's in my head, with Doe as the highly popular pornstar watching me as I lifted the bed with one hand and set it perfectly in the center of the room, followed by some snide comment like "If only there was someone who could help me break it in" or something stupid like that.Suddenly I realized I was daydreaming a little too obviously and broke myself out of it."Uhhhh yeah, no problem."She could tell I had hesitated, and at me embarrassingly. "That sounded kind of porn-esque didn't it?"How the hell?"Uhhhhh what?"She caught me and walked up,. It certainly worked because I got several compliments on it from the men in the neighborhood. Inside the invitation was the date and time, a list of what food and drink would be available, and the fact that the water would be the center of our entertainment.That Saturday people started arriving just before noon. The men seemed disappointed that I was in a more normal bikini and made comments to that affect.As the drinks flowed everyone loosened up. Jim our neighbor on the right was some sort of radio station person and seemed to take over our entertainment. My husband told me that he had set him up to see how far he could get the women in the neighborhood to go. What!He held a bikini contest where the smallest one was chosen as well as the largest bikini, then the one that looked the best on its owner. Then the men got to pick the largest set of breasts as well as the smallest set and the most perfect set. After that were best butt, longest legs, and nicest hair competitions..
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