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. I instructed.‘Yes, they used to be, ‘ ... Replied the patient.Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct.Not more than five minutes later, I heard herReporting to the rest of the family that he hadDied of a ‘massive internal fart.’Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg4. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, ‘How long have you been bedridden?’After a look of complete confusion she answered...‘ Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.’Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson, Corvallis, OR5. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB.I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams ... To cover my embarrassmentI had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughingAnd further embarrassing me.I looked up from my work and sheepishly. But right how I was furious at my best friend Kenji. During the time I needed him the most he was a no show. The only person I could even image talking to about this and he was avoiding me. And that hurt worse than anything I had felt because of the monster. And the worst part was that I knew this something he’d love to hear about.I wish I knew why he was avoiding me. I knew he was the one to find me afterwards and carry me back to my dorm room. I had flashes of the trip in between my loses of consciousness. In those small glimpses, I could see the tears running down his face and his voice telling over and over that he was sorry. Though, I wasn’t sure what he was sorry for. When I had woken up the next morning he was gone and I hadn’t seen him since. Was he disgusted by me now that I had been fucked by a tentacle monster? Was I not worthy of his friendship? Did he hate me because he saw what happened to me. Why was he avoiding me?Unable to stand it and longer I rushed upstairs to the.
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