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Brownhair, fat-ass. The bane of Butters' existence and his best friend. Hecould make Butters do and think anything.It was an ordinary Tuesday, and Butters treated it no differantly. Ashe skipped closer to the bus stop, he noticed only Cartman there. "HeyEric, where are the fellas?" "Oh Butters thankgod. I need you to dosomething..." Oh hamburgers, he thought, this can't be good. "Well,sure Eric, what is it?" "I need you to give me a dollar for the bus."This happened nearly everyday, so Butters always brought $2 for thebus.After about 20mins of waiting, the bus finally pulled in. As Buttersclimed the steps and handed the driver the money, he noticed somethingdifferent. It wasn't the normal, ugly bus driver. No, it was...Ms.Cartman??? "Excuse me, Ms.Cartman maam, um, where's the normaldriver, maam?" stuttered the always-polite Butters. "Oh hello Butters.She's in hospital after a vicious rape. Apparently 5 boys jumped herlast night. She barely survived. Oh hello snuckums!" Butters. Jake Junior smiled broadly. “I’ll start doing the paperwork!”John muttered, “Unbelievable!” and then he put a hand on young Jake’s arm. “Okay, start your paperwork, but until we do this, I am still legally Carl’s lawyer, and so are you. This violates about a zillion ethics rules if we don’t get a third party to vet the paperwork.”“Agreed,” said Jake Senior.Missy solved the problem. “I know some guys who know some guys. I’ll get somebody from New York to review it all, an outside source.” The others all agreed with this, and we broke apart. In the meantime, we would continue going as we had been, and the others would start making their plans for coming up with the buy-in.In the meantime, something interesting happened. I was contacted by the State Department! It seemed that the Bahamian government wanted to give me an award or a plaque or something for helping their police catch that gang of robbers. They wanted me to come down to Washington to receive the award. I told them I’d let.
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