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The dress was long and touched the grass where she stood talking to another girl, woman. Her hands occasionally touched the other girl but it didn’t matter because I wasn’t watching. They separated and I looked up at the first stars that broke through the flame that was the sky. Now the colours were deep and had such warmth that I felt drowsy looking at them. ‘Your glass is empty.’ She looked down at me from beside my chair – she held two full glasses and, smiling, offered one to me. ‘I’ve probably had enough but thank you.’ I smiled up at her and took the glass, placing my empty on the table in front of me. ‘We’ve all probably had enough. But it is a Friday night so it won’t matter.’ I could smell the sea, almost hear it just beyond the dunes that guarded it. She stood, just looking and smiling. Then she sat on the table and looked harder at me. ‘Are you watching me?’ She grinned, ‘Yes, like you were watching me.’ ‘I was not! I could see you but………..’ Her finger touched my lip. ‘If. Probably theecoats followed by a sealer. Once this has dried, I spend most of the daywondering around my flat admiring myself in the large number of mirrors Ihave installed in the flat.Monday to Friday, I return to my "normal appearance". However, I realisethat my weekend activities are more and more intruding into my thoughtsand the more and more that I want them to become my everyday way of life.My simple desire to wear more expressive clothes has now become an achingcraving to become totally and completely feminine at all times. Thecraving becomes an obsession. I am determined to become the perfectfeminine species. I start the process to achieve my ambitions. Firstly, Istart a treatment of electrolysis to rid myself of my beard, hair on myarms and legs. I use body cream to soften my skin; I continue to grow myhair. Every weekend I continue to indulge my feminine dress up and Ipractice and practice walking, talking, and gesturing in a femininefashion. I watch films of people like.
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